Burned Out Homemaker: Encouragement for the Christian Mom to Find Joy in Homemaking

Can I share something hard with you?

There was a time in my life when I felt completely overwhelmed with homemaking and motherhood. I was so burned out and lived everyday from a state of drudgery. I remember telling a friend:

“I hate this. I’m not cut out for it. Every day feels like trudging through molasses, and I just want to escape. I feel like a terrible mom and homemaker. The days are dreadfully long and horrible. I wish there were fewer hours in a day so I didn’t have to do this for so long.”

Can you relate?

If you’re nodding along, let me encourage you: God sees you. He cares about you. And He is writing your redemption story, just like He wrote mine.

Today, I want to share with you the lessons He taught me— some of the tips that helped me transform my heart and home. Here are 4 practical tips to help you overcome the drudgery and rediscover joy in your homemaking journey.

4 Tips for the Burned-Out Homemaker

Focus on What Really Matters

Do you ever feel like you’re doing all the right things but still feel drained? That was me—always busy, always anxious. I realized I was being such a Martha.

In Luke’s gospel, Martha is busy serving while Mary sits at Jesus’ feet, soaking in His teaching. When Martha complains to Jesus, He gently tells her, “You are anxious about many things, but Mary has chosen the good portion.”

Homemaking becomes drudgery when we focus on doing instead of being. Yes, chores are important, but our first priority should be drawing close to the Lord, building a strong marriage, and discipling our children. The tasks of homemaking should flow out of that—not the other way around.

Start your day at Jesus’ feet, and let Him set the tone for how you joyfully serve your family.

Find Mentors

God never intended for us to do this alone. In Titus 2, older women are called to teach and encourage younger women.

Your mentor doesn’t have to be decades older than you. She could simply be a mom one or two steps ahead of you. Someone who’s walked through the trenches you’re currently in and can offer encouragement, perspective, and practical advice.

Pray for God to connect you with someone who can walk alongside you. When you find her, don’t be afraid to ask for help, share your struggles, and let her encourage you. Homemaking is hard, but we grow in community.

Be Playful

Do you often feel annoyed with your family? Here’s a simple yet powerful tip: be playful.

Playfulness can turn stressful situations into joyful ones and even help calm your own nervous system. Here are two examples:

When your husband zones out while you’re talking:

Instead of snapping, try walking up to him, taking his face in your hands, and saying in a playful tone, “Hey… can’t you see I’m talkin’?” You’ll be amazed at how quickly this shifts the mood.

When your children aren’t listening:

Instead of getting frustrated, make it a game. Say, “Okay, it seems like we have a listening problem today. Time to practice! Give me 5 jumping jacks! Great! Now run a lap around the house as fast as you can! Woo hoo! Pick up these blocks! Nicely done!”

Sure, serious conversations are necessary sometimes, but a playful response often diffuses tension and builds connection.

Sometimes the Best Thing to Do Is… Nothing

This wisdom comes from my husband, who often reminds me that not every issue requires an immediate response.

When we react in the heat of the moment, we’re often operating out of fight-or-flight mode, which rarely leads to productive outcomes. Here’s how this plays out in different situations:

With your husband:

Instead of arguing in the moment, let it go temporarily. Pray about it and ask God to either convict you if you’re wrong or convict your husband. When you’re calm and guided by the Holy Spirit, revisit the issue.

With your crying baby:

If you’re in the middle of cooking or reading to a toddler, it’s okay to finish what you’re doing. Your baby will be fine for a few minutes. This mindset can free you to focus on tasks without feeling paralyzed by “what ifs.”

With a disobedient toddler:

If you feel your anger rising, take a moment to cool off before disciplining. You can send your child to another room while you calm down. A calm response will be far more effective than a heated one.

Sometimes, the best thing to do is nothing. At least not right away.

Your Redemption Story

These tips helped me transform my heart and home, and I believe they can help you too.

If you’re feeling stuck, remember: God is with you. Start with one small step today. Maybe it’s sitting at Jesus’ feet, reaching out to a mentor, or choosing playfulness instead of frustration.

Little by little, God will transform your heart and your home.

You are never alone in this journey.