Why Christian Mothers Are Burnt Out—and What to Do When God Feels Silent

You’ve tried everything—every planner, every schedule, every supplement, every system. You’ve decluttered your home, read the books, taken the deep breaths… But somehow, you’re still here.

Overwhelmed. Overstimulated. And burnt out.

You might be thinking, “Maybe I’m just not cut out for this whole motherhood thing.”

And if that’s you, I want to say something that might sting a little—but it will also set you free.
This is what helped me break free from the spiral of burnout.

If You’re a Burnt-Out Christian Mom…

If you’re a Christian mother who is feeling burnt out and longing to be the joyful mother and wife you always imagined—without turning to therapy, supplements, or constantly decluttering your home—you don’t have to stay stuck in survival mode.

And if you’re wondering how I went from surviving each day to creating a peaceful, joyful home—even with three little ones at my feet—I walk through the exact process I followed in my free workshop. You can watch it anytime—just click the link below.

1. Feeding Sinful Thoughts

Ok, so here’s my thoughts on why moms are burnt out and you can test it.

Burnout is often just a symptom of a deeper spiritual reality: our thought life is being overcome by sin, not anchored in truth.

I know this path well. I’ve lived it. And I’ve also walked out of it, so I can see clearly through the fog I once lived in.
You don’t fall into burnout overnight. You think your way there one destructive thought at a time.

Because when we don’t take our thoughts captive, they take us captive.

• We fester in irritation, which grows into anger.
• Anger becomes fear.
• Fear becomes anxiety.
• And anxiety becomes despair.

“For whatever overcomes a person, to that he is enslaved.” (2 Peter 2:19)

This is the burnout spiral. And it all starts in the mind.

Since sin starts in the mind, it has to pass through the mind and your will in order to come to fruition—to avoid that, we can continually renew our mind.

The Slug Story

OK, so I have a story to share and I hope you think it’s as funny as we think it is in our home, but I also hope you hear the lesson in it… it will forever go down as the slug story in my house—and maybe in the whole neighborhood, because I think everybody heard it.

This was not a proud moment for me. Actually, I was in sin. I was not walking in the Spirit. I was choosing sin again and again. And because of that, I was just burnt out—overstimulated. In this moment, I was overstimulated because I was not renewing my mind. The house was in shambles and the visual clutter was starting to consume me.

So anyway, I was freaking out, basically. I took a step outside for some fresh air, just trying to reset. I was standing there, breathing it in, and all of a sudden, I heard one of my kids inside—I don’t even know what happened. Maybe they fell, or dropped something, or were just yelling. But immediately I thought, Of course. Now I have to go back inside and deal with this. All I wanted was some air.

So I go inside all upset still and still sort of freaking out inside—and everything is fine. The kids are fine. Nothing happened. And then I’m just… mad. Mad that I had to interrupt my one moment of peace and come in for no reason.

And you know those moments when you’re just so maxed out—your thoughts are spiraling, your brain feels like a jumbled mess—you are not in your right mind. That was me. My brain felt fuzzy and then, all of a sudden, I feel something slimy and disgusting under my foot.

So in that fuzzy-brained state, I was like, What is this thing on my foot?! A slug?! Why is there a SLUG on my FOOT?!

And I start cracking up. Just totally losing it laughing.

And then I’m mad that I’m laughing—because you know when you want to be mad, you don’t want to laugh, but how do you not laugh at a slug on your foot in the house in the middle of a freak out?

So I’m laughing. And then my kids start laughing because Mommy’s laughing. And just like that, everything was squashed. The tension broke. I felt at least 60% better—at least to the point where I wasn’t losing it.

And I genuinely think God placed that slug there on the porch for a reason. To snap me out of the spiral.

What’s Your Slug?

So now I ask you: What’s your slug?

What’s the thing that’s going to snap you out of it when you’re spiraling—snap you out of the cycle of destructive thoughts?

Now of course, you can’t manufacture a slug (and why would you want to? Gross). You can’t plan a random weird event like that to break the tension. But you can plant truth. You can intentionally create habits that help interrupt the spiral, and that’s exactly what I teach in my free workshop.

2. Allowing Guilt to Linger Instead of Repenting

Guilt without grace is just spiritual torment.

There’s a secular song I used to listen to called Cold Little Heart by Michael Kiwanuka. It’s haunting and honest—about human brokenness, regret, guilt. And while it captures the ache of sin, it stops just short of hope.

It’s a Psalm with no Psalmist.

• There’s no cry for mercy.
• No Redeemer.
• Just endless sorrow and self-effort.

It’s a beautiful song, but dangerous because without Jesus, guilt will just crush you.

“Worldly sorrow brings death, but godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to life.” — 2 Corinthians 7:10

If you’re just sitting in guilt—why can’t I get this right? My family would be better off without me, I’m the problem—then you’re trapped in the song with no Savior.

But there is One who gives you a new heart.

3. The Fight or Flight Fog Isn’t All Your Fault

Being burnt out doesn’t mean you’re failing—it means something deeper needs healing.

Someone wrote to me recently and said:

“I’m 17 years into parenting. It’s snowballed into shame and total self-despise. My marriage is in shambles. No one in the church relates. And I’m just… tired.”

Someone else said:

“The constant fight or flight mode is especially so relevant. Do you think all of this — the rage, depression, anxiety, overwhelm, etc — is my fault? Like, I know I’m so sinful and so far from Jesus’ perfect example, but I also know that I’ve been trying SO hard to be the woman, wife, and mama He wants me to be. Is all of this my own doing?”

I get these types of emails all the time, so I know many of you are sitting there in your own guilt and shame feeling this way. So, more than anything, I want you to feel the nearness of Christ right there in your struggle.

Grace First. Then Truth.

So if you’re wondering this too—if your burnout is all your fault…

Let me answer with grace first. Then truth.

No. This isn’t all your fault.

Living in a fallen world means we experience the crushing weight of exhaustion, mental fog, hormonal shifts, spiritual warfare, generational patterns, and burdens we were never meant to carry alone.

The fact that you’re in fight-or-flight, overwhelmed and tearful, is not a reflection of failure—it’s a signal that something in your inner world is aching to be healed, rewired, and set free.

And that’s where the Lord delights to meet us.

4. When You Don’t Have Clarity—Submit and Trust

So you’re a Christian mother who is burnt out. You’ve prayed. You’ve cried. You’ve asked God to show you what to do. But you’re still burnt out, and starting to wonder… why isn’t He answering?

I’ve been there.

Five years ago, when my husband and I had to cancel our wedding due to COVID and the policies in our state, I was so upset and MAD at the state of Washington. I wanted so badly to get out of there. I prayed for the Lord to get us out and take us somewhere more in alignment with our values. But my husband wasn’t on board and there was NO way we could have left at the time. So the answer was a clear “no” or “not right now.”

Delayed Answers Are Still Answers

So, I embraced my state and actually fell in love with it. Loved the community I fostered and was so grateful for where I lived—my home, property, community, family. I fell in love with the season in which the Lord had told me “no.”

Fast forward to present day (rather, like 3 months ago), and my husband was finally expressing interest in leaving the state. I was in disbelief because now I was the one not really wanting to leave! But I was also open to the possibility. We started applying for jobs near Idaho. All these doors flung open and it was WILD because the Lord was clearly making a way.

BUT… then things got really confusing. We wanted to back out. We prayed and got NOTHING. Silence. Fear. Confusion.

Surrender Brings Clarity

Then it occurred to me: I don’t have to shoulder this. I gave it to my husband and said, “I trust your opinion.” And I truly trusted the Lord to guide his heart. Within one day, my husband got a VERY clear answer—he KNEW that moving was the right choice. He felt at peace. So did I.

Then I remembered: five years ago, I had prayed for this. And now, the Lord was answering it.

We’re moving this week to North Idaho.

Prayer Answered

If you’re in this situation, think back: Is this actually an answer to a previous prayer? Could be from years ago.

Sometimes we assume if something doesn’t happen quickly, the answer is “no.” But often, God is saying “wait”—not because He’s withholding, but because He’s preparing.

And ultimately, you need to submit the decision to the Lord. When you surrender, clarity often comes. Ask your husband for guidance if you can, then trust that the Lord can give him the wisdom to lead.

You Don’t Need Another Hack

So if you feel like you’re stuck in burnout, it’s not too late.

• You don’t need another hack or tip.
• You need a new mind. A new heart.
• And Jesus gives you both.

If you’re looking for the exact system I used to calm my nervous system and rewire my brain, I walk through the exact steps inside my free workshop.

It’s always such a joy to have you here.