The Secret to a Simplified Home (It’s Not What You Think!)

You’ve decluttered, reorganized, and tried new routines—but your home still feels overwhelming. No matter how much you do, the chaos keeps creeping back in.

But here’s the good news: there’s a way to create a peaceful home without feeling like a slave to it. And it doesn’t require working harder to declutter your home, implementing a new organizing strategy, or following a strict cleaning system. It requires retraining your mind to approach homemaking differently.

True freedom is learning to calm your mind in the middle of the chaos.

And that is the key to a calm, simplified home. When you master this, you’ll be well on your way to the peaceful, joy-filled home you long for—regardless of the circumstances.

When Everything Felt Like Too Much

When I had two kids, I could still manage everything pretty well. The house stayed clean most of the time, I kept up with my favorite routines, and while it wasn’t always easy, it didn’t feel impossible.

But then, baby number three came along. Suddenly, no matter how much I cleaned, the house never felt “clean,” and my tasks never seemed “done.” I was constantly overwhelmed but couldn’t figure out why.

Then, I heard something that made it all make sense. A couple of moms were talking about how three kids are often harder than four. Not because of the children themselves, but because at three, you can still technically do it all—but you really shouldn’t.

Most moms at this stage are still holding onto the same expectations they had with one or two children, and that’s what makes it feel impossible. But once you finally let go—that’s when you can breathe again.

And that’s exactly what I had to do—let go and surrender.

The Gift of Peace in Homemaking

The funny thing about peace is that it’s not something you can strive to create—it’s a fruit of the Spirit, a gift from the Lord.

For so long, I believed that if I could just find the right home management system, declutter more, or develop the perfect cleaning routine, I would finally feel at peace. But no matter how much I tried, I was still overwhelmed.

Until one day, I stood in my messy kitchen—dishes piled high, the baby screaming, my hands tied with another child, crumbs everywhere—and I felt like the walls were caving in on me. Overwhelmed, I whispered, “Lord, I can’t do this. Help me.”

And in that moment, the Lord impressed something on my heart. I realized that I was trying to control everything instead of trusting God to sustain me.

Peace doesn’t come from keeping a perfect home or controlling all the little things that make us feel comfortable. It comes from surrendering our expectations and letting God guide us through our days without the desperate need to control it all.

How to Practically Surrender

You might be wondering… Okay, I want to surrender, but how?!

In my course, I teach something called Brain Retraining Mindsets (BRMs), which are part of the Christian brain rewiring formula I share with my students. These act as anchors throughout the day, helping you align your thoughts with God’s truth and respond with intention rather than reactivity.

One of my students shared how she used this in a stressful moment:

“One night my 2-year-old was freaking out at the dinner table, so I took him to the other room to calm down. He was tantruming, and I could feel myself winding tighter and tighter in my chest. I’m sure we’ve all felt this at some point. Then the Spirit reminded me of my BRM: ‘I am a calm and joyful mother.’ In that moment, I chose to believe it and lived into that belief. It was a pivotal moment in my journey.”

For many women, the struggle isn’t just knowing what to do—it’s feeling paralyzed by guilt, self-doubt, or the fear of failure. They want to change but feel stuck in old patterns.

And that’s why my course has been such a catalyst for transformation. It doesn’t just provide the tools—it gives women the permission and the pathway to step into a new way of being.

That’s why I LOVE emails like this.

If you feel stuck in this cycle and long for a breakthrough, I’d love for you to join my Free Christian Homemaking Reset Workshop, where I’ll teach you how I broke free from chronic overstimulation and drudgery in homemaking. I’ll leave the link below!

The One Thing That Was Secretly Overcomplicating My Home

There was one more thing I was doing that was unknowingly making my home more complicated—even though I thought it was making life easier.

I was constantly Googling how to run my home.

Hear me out—I know what you’re thinking. Sometimes you just need to research something! And I’m not saying to never Google anything ever again. But what I am suggesting is that you reduce your sphere of influence—a lot.

Here’s what my routine used to look like:

1. I’d have an issue, like my baby having eczema.

2. I’d instantly turn to Google, which would lead me to Reddit threads and blog posts.

3. Then, I’d check my trusty Facebook groups, which would send me down a whole new rabbit hole.

4. Before I knew it, I’d wasted two hours in “research” and was even more confused than before.

Now, I do what mothers used to do:

• I pray about the issue first.

• I talk to my husband.

• I ask a few trusted women from church or Bible study.

That’s it. It’s simple and freeing.

Your home will be so much simpler when you reduce the amount of input you have and whittle it down to just a few trusted influences.

If you don’t have a strong community of Christian women in your life, my heart goes out to you—because nothing is more valuable than that. But in addition to prayer and your husband, I’d encourage you to choose just a handful of trusted resources (like this blog!) to guide you.

The key is to avoid falling into research rabbit holes that leave you more overwhelmed than before.

Letting Go of Unrealistic Expectations

There comes a moment when you realize that the stress in your home isn’t just coming from the mess or the chaos—it’s coming from the weight of your own unrealistic expectations.

It’s good to have high standards for your home and children. Growth happens here, and that’s a good thing! But if your standards are making you resentful, anxious, or exhausted, they might be stealing your joy.

For a long time, I let what I learned from other homemakers guide my expectations. But I wasn’t getting the full story of their lives, routines, and children. What worked for them wasn’t working for me.

I reached a turning point—I could either let comparison turn me into a stressed-out tyrant or create a home environment that was right for MY family.

It’s a breath of fresh air to let go of guilt and embrace the freedom to live by the standards that serve your unique family.

The Secret to a Simplified Home

The secret to a simplified home isn’t decluttering—it’s learning to stay calm in the chaos so that no matter what’s happening around you, you set the tone of your home.

You do this intentionally by:

• Surrendering the stressful seasons to the Lord.

• Filling your mind with God’s truth instead of information overload.

• Reducing your sphere of influence.

• Having realistic expectations that work for your family.

If you want help with this, check out my Free Christian Homemaking Reset Workshop. It’s designed to help you overcome overwhelm, retrain your brain for peace, and create a home that feels joyful.

Let me know in the comments—what’s one thing you’re letting go of this week to simplify your home? I’d love to hear from you!